We didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to get at the parrot. My wife walked on out to the taxi, whilst I went back inside to get the cat. The cat ran upstairs, with me in hot pursuit.
Waiting in the cab, my wife didn't want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. So, she explained to the taxi driver that I would be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
A few minutes later, I got into the cab. "Sorry I took so long," I said, as we drove away. "That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her up the backside with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me, but it worked! I hauled her fat backside downstairs and threw her out into the back garden!.......She'd better not s**t in the vegetable patch again!."
The silence in the taxi was deafening.
