My Wife was hinting on about a present for our upcoming Anniversary. She said she wanted something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds. So I went out and bought a set of bathroom scales. Thats when the row started.
She asked me to take her somewhere expensive. So I took her to the petrol station...
then the row started.
My wife was standing in front of the mirror and she said I feel horrible and look old and fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment and tell me somethings good about me.
I said "Your eyesights damn near perfect" Then the row started.
We went to a school reunion of mine the other day and there was a woman sat there on her own drinking, and quite drunk. My wife said why does she keep looking at you ,"do you know her". I said she was an old girlfriend and when we split up 20 years ago she turned to drink.
My wife said "My God I've never met anyone who could celebrate that long"
Thats when the row started.
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