Labrador Rescue

What does Miley Cyrus have at Christmas?
Twerky.

Why did no-one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay?
Because they were two deer.

Mary and Joseph - now they had a stable relationship.

What does the Queen call her Christmas Broadcast?
The One Show.

What did Santa do when he went speed dating?
He pulled a cracker.

Why don't you ever see Santa in hospital?
Because he has private elf care.

How did Mary and Joseph know that Jesus was 7lb 6oz when he was born?
They had a weigh in a manger.

Why is it getting harder to buy Advent calendars?
Because their days are numbered.

How do you know if Santa's been in your garden shed?
You've got three extra hoes.

Why was the Brussels sprout sent to prison?
Because it was a repeat offender

you were right corny xx



This one is true

Customer goes into a chip shop and says can I have sausage and chips ( they are put in those cartons that close up) he says this week can you put my sausage on the top as I like to eat it first and last week it was under the chips.
Manager says did you think of turning it the right way up

Thanks for the laughs Joanna

Aline & Sam